*"I Saw Your Like" (extended version)

I saw your like
I saw your like
On my Facebook page, I saw your like.

Adam Carr, I saw your like
A way, way back when.
Then your name vanished
From the "People who like this" list.
Asking about it made you flustered
And you pleaded ignorance.
Were you pissed?

Meg Rose, I saw your like
Before I sent you an invite.
You were happy to lend support
Yet had a change of heart.
I'm not sure exactly which part
of Mad Mom caused you to abort.

I saw your like
I saw your like
On my Facebook page, I saw your like.

Barbara Lyons, you dropped off after unfriending me.
I hadn't taken kindly to your mean-girl moves
Of stealing my fan boy
And playing coy
And feeding me lies
And refusing to apologize.

I know the tricks. You claim, "I liked the page,"
But you really didn't as my notifications tell me so.
"I liked the page," says another. Ha! A second click
Of the button makes it a no, no, NO.

I saw your like
I saw your like
On my Facebook page, I saw your like.

I work hard posting every ten days
To build my fan base one by one
Up to 177 likes. Wait, what's this?
The total has slipped to 176!

Then it happened again and again --
FIVE times in four weeks!
Would I ever get to 177?
And exactly when?

I saw your like
I saw your like
On my Facebook page, I saw your like.

Soon I smartened up:
I started noticing a trend.
"Unlikes" -- usually few and far between --
followed public, first-name-dropping thank yous.
My posts of gratitude became your cues!

Maybe I wouldn't notice losing one like.
Hey, that's where you underestimate me
Because every day I check my tally
Like a stockbroker, obsessively.

I saw your like
I saw your like
On my Facebook page, I saw your like.

I'm onto your games.
They are certainly clever
and quite amusing.
They evoke: "It depends upon what the meaning
of the word 'is' is."

That line fooled no one
And you don't fool me.
Relax, lest you think I am angry.
I am on my iPad right now
Laughing hysterically.

Yes, I know you are fibbing.
I'm just giving you a ribbing.
So please take this in jest.
It's not an MCAS test.

I saw your like
I saw your like
On my Facebook page, I saw your like.

*To be sung to the tune of "We Saw Your Boobs," Seth MacFarlane's controversial Oscar ditty.